Meeting with a potential surrogate could be an uncomfortable situation. You will be face-to-face with someone you may not even know, asking them numerous questions, and deciding whether or not she is fit to carry your child. But, it is imperative you ask the right questions, no matter how awkward and uncomfortable they may be in order to find the right person for the role.
Surrogacy interviews are not job interviews. You need to get down to very personal question, ones that may be embarrassing to ask. Ultimately you want to find out if this person will provide you with a healthy baby. It is in your best interest to have your attorney present not only to make sure you ask the right questions, but so that your attorney can help assess the potential surrogate’s answers.
Are You Married?
A married surrogate might seem awkward, but it may actually make the process easier if the surrogate has someone to give them support during the process. But, this is a two-sided question too. If the surrogate is married or has a partner, you may need that person to consent to a sexually-transmitted disease screening as well as the potential surrogate mother.
Have You Been a Surrogate or Had Children in the Past?
You want a healthy child that is carried to term. This is hard to determine if the woman has never had a child before. Women who have had pregnancies in the past that were non-complicated and carried to term are a good sign. That being said, you do not want a surrogate who has had too many children already, pre-term labor or a history of miscarriages.
Why Do You Want to Be a Surrogate?
This is an uncomfortable question for both parties, but the answer is crucial. While the individual may have monetary motives, they most likely have other reasons for being a surrogate. By asking the question you can get to know the surrogate a little better and appreciate her sacrifice and situation a little more.
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Can We Be in the Delivery Room? Can We Go to Doctor’s Appointments?
You may not be carrying the child, but it is your child, so it’s only natural you would like to be involved. But, it is the surrogate’s body. Find out if she will allow you to go to doctor’s appointments and whether or not you can be present when your baby is born. Ideally you want a surrogate that involves you as much as possible.
Abortion is not an easy topic to bring up, but it must be discussed. First you must find out if the surrogate is opposed to abortion. Because, if a medical problem arises during the pregnancy and medical professionals recommend aborting the pregnancy, you will need a surrogate that agrees.
Also, the surrogate does have a legal right to abort the fetus. Therefore, you want to discuss this topic with them intensely. If your contract doesn’t have an abortion clause, you may be required to still pay the surrogate even if the pregnancy was aborted.
Compensation is one of the more difficult topics to discuss with a potential surrogate, but highly important. You both need to agree on compensation, including any costs during the pregnancy and any post-partum care you’ll cover. For example, will you have to supply funds for maternity wear?
Another thing to consider is miscarriage. Often a miscarriage is unpredictable and not the fault of the surrogate, but if it happens, will you be required to pay out the contract? In most cases, you will be required to pro-rate up to the month the miscarriage occurs, but you will want to see what type of compensation your surrogate thinks is reasonable, too.
Have an Experienced Surrogacy Attorney by Your Side
During your interviews, you may not know what questions to ask or how to ask them, but an experienced surrogacy attorney can help. Enlist the assistance of a trustworthy Florida surrogacy attorney from the Law Offices of Aliette H. Carolan. We are more than happy to represent you during the interview process and we will even help draft your surrogacy contracts. Give us a call today for a no obligation consultation by dialing 305-358-2330.