Divorce can be costly, both financially and emotionally. There are some divorce costs that cannot be avoided. However, there are other divorce costs that could be forgone, if people knew strategies to adopt during the divorce process.
Every Divorce is Different
Every divorce is different. This means that your friend’s experience, or your sister’s experience, or your co-worker’s experience with their divorce will be different than yours. Some people spend a lot of time (and a lot of attorney billable hours) calling their attorney and asking why their friend got a larger cash settlement, a different timesharing schedule for the children, or was able to keep the house. However, divorce settlements don’t happen in a vacuum. Unless your attorney also represented your friend or sister or coworker, they can’t possibly know sufficient details to determine why they got a different settlement. Even if they did represent the other person, they can’t disclose confidential information about another client’s divorce. Rather than asking your attorney to consider another person’s divorce, focus on your own case.
Rely on Your Attorney for Legal Advice
It may seem natural to want more timesharing with the children, more of the property, and less of the debt. However, Florida presumes having a relationship with each parent is in the best interests of the child. Further, Florida law starts with the premise that assets will be divided equally. Put aside what you have heard about other people’s divorce settlements, and carefully consider what might be reasonable in your situation. If you are unsure about what is reasonable in your situation, discuss this with your attorney. A family law attorney has the experience you need to help set reasonable expectations for you.
Rely on Your Friends for Emotional Support
No one knows you better than your friends and family. That’s why it makes sense for you to rely on them for emotional support as you go through this challenging time. Friends can listen and offer support. If a friend offers the words, “If there is anything I can do. . .,“ take them up on it. Ask them to go for a walk or join you for coffee. See if they will take the kids for an hour so you can have a good cry or get out of the house. Friends offer their emotional support for free. Attorneys, on the other hand, charge by the hour.
Put Aside Emotion
Emotions often run high during divorce. Sometimes the desire to punish one’s spouse leads to unnecessary litigation. Other times, the emotional investment in the family home obscures the fact the person can’t really afford the taxes and upkeep on the house itself. Emotion can lead to bad financial decision making. It is often best to rely on financial experts to make an informed decision about your financial future.
If you are considering divorce, contact the Carolan Family Law Clinic, P.A. We focus on family law and divorce issues exclusively. Let us help you come to a solution that works for you and your family. Call today at 305-358-2330.